I’ve always believed that I was quite effective in the ‘not giving up on stuff’ department, in fact more than once I’ve confidently used the words tenacious and determined to describe myself. I can think of some cracking examples throughout my life where I’ve clung on till my fingertips bled in pursuit of something I believed in, and I’d even count one or two successful visits to Skinny Town in the past as examples I can bandy about of me being hardcore when it counts.
Except when I say clung on until my fingertips bled, I am of course speaking metaphorically. No actual bleeding happened, because that would have meant pain, and I don’t do pain. I mean don’t get me wrong, there are times in your life when you can’t avoid it – having a baby for example, or getting sick.
To be fair when my boy was born I wheeled out the diva and demanded so much pain relief I was probably stoned for his first six months, but I have been through some other tough medical stuff where I had to just suck it up. I’ve talked in here before about the run in I had with the big C which involved a fair few cut and shut jobs. Sometimes you don’t have a choice and getting on with it is the only option open to you.
But pain, in pursuit of a goal? You know, when you have a choice, and could choose not to hurt..? That I’m finding it harder to get my head around. And before you laugh and call me a fanny, I know I’m only talking about six minutes on a cross trainer on the lowest setting, it’s hardly the north face of the Eiger, right? But don’t forget I’m carrying the equivalent of a whole other person around in my pants, and no matter how large or small the frame of reference, pain is pain. I did six minutes this morning and it hurt.
I almost gave up…it was a really close call that I didn’t. The asshole in my head was determined to build on his victory from yesterday when I’d programmed ten minutes but managed only five. I did complete the other five minutes last night before I went to bed but made the rookie mistake of not warming up or cooling down – I mean come on it was five lousy minutes, who knew it even mattered? For future reference, it does.
My legs were bitching at me before I’d even opened my eyes this morning and I made the journey from the bed to the cross-trainer in the style of Norman Wisdom, a fact shamelessly exploited by the asshole voice as a reason to quit as I winced my way through six minutes of hurt.
I’m really going to need to get a handle on this. When you google phrases like pushing through the pain, or digging deep to achieve your goals, you get hundreds and hundreds of inspirational quotes, but not a single bloody one that tells you how. I don’t need platitudes, I need advice and it’s a bit thin on the ground.
I’m scared that I’ll give up…there, I’ve said it. I’m scared that when the going gets tough I’ll just fold and think nah, not for me. And I can’t. I need to learn how not to give up, and practice not giving up ’till it’s baked into my psyche. Imagine if I’m halfway over that mountain in Cuba, and I get a blister that really hurts. They’re hardly going to call mountain rescue are they? I’ll be expected to just bloody get on with it and stop moaning. I need to find a way of pulling out the kind of mental resilience which keeps you nailed on to the task in hand even when you hurt.
If there was a pit of crocodiles under the cross trainer, or some device primed to blow my buns off if I slipped below so many strides per minute I’d have no choice but to keep going…right now my kit-bag of reasons not to quit is feeling a bit light, so any suggestions would be gratefully considered 🙂
This may sound silly, but I always picture that I am in one of those biggest loser competitions where the one who lasts longest wins, and then I’m so stubborn and competitive, that I keep doing what I need to do.
Hiya…that doesn’t sound silly at all, I can see how that would work actually. It sounds like you understand what pushes your buttons and you’re using it to help you power through…good for you! All these different approaches will be road-tested this week, thank you! D x
Good luck with the voting! Am voting as many times as I can xxxx
Thanks Chick! xx
Baby steps is definitely the way to go! You don’t need to increase the amount you do each day, maybe each week instead. So 5 mins three times a week for the next week then up to 6 mins the week after. The key for me is to feel I’m making progress so by doing the same amount for a week you will find it easier by the end of the week, feel you have achieved something and then push yourself a bit further the following week. You are doing so well so don’t beat yourself up over this.
Hey Claire…Thanks for the encouragement – I have to keep reminding myself how far I’ve come in the last few weeks even…so typical of me though, wanting to be great straight away. When will I ever learn! 🙂
If it is hurting that much – so much you are in danger of quitting – then like Jo suggested I’d definitely start with less and increase gradually. 3 minutes tomorrow. Then 3 and a half the next day. Or do one minute three times a day. Let your body get used to this new type of movement before you ramp it up.
I think that’s solid advice…I managed six this morning and six tonight, as well as a three mile walk with Charlie dog earlier. I think I’m going to try three times five minutes tomorrow…I’m determined to find my groove 🙂
Is there something you like to do each morning that you can forbid yourself from doing until the exercise is over? For me, it would be delaying my morning cup of coffee. That would be worth exercising to get to it for me.
Yes there is, but for me it’s not really starting it that’s the problem…it’s pushing through when it really starts to hurt. That’s where I’m going to have to really go to a place that I’ve never reached before. I don’t like it when it hurts!!
Courage, guys! I am beyond thrilled, that you (& you & who else…?) are getting on yr torture devices. Grumble, grit teeth, visualize, chant & curse; and carry on.
Fellow cross-trainer fans are right about the benefits, so are non-athletic types who grudgingly walk. From big-enough-to-burn-diesel, my bulk has apparently been getting whittled (did i mention the Levi’s I bought in November without actually believing i might ever get in them?) I can wear them.
Without creating public outrage.
Wit WOO Fleury…and I bet you look awesome 🙂
So do you, I bet! I remind myself that at this distance from either train station, my eyes do not work properly. Pick the Vegetable Medley… get in a daily sweat. Go for it, without having to re-make the decision. It’s time for blind ambition! Love, F.
I look better than I did 5 months ago, but not as good as I will this time next year Fleury 🙂 Thoughts spurring me on, on the hurt machine!
I’m guessing those jeans will be FAB!
I don’t know what all yours counts, but I play games with myself to not quit. For example: Mine shows time, calories, distance and heart rate. So I will say to myself “Just go until: … You have burned 5 more calories, made it to an even # of minutes, one more 1/10th of a mile or heart rate into target range.” After I flip through all of those and set minute goals I re-set them and re-set them. Trying to keep myself distracted by all of this negotiation long enough to actually make it a workout.
Yes, that could work…little steps. That’s sort of what Sir Chris Hoy talked about when I heard him speak…fooling his legs into thinking that this circuit will be the last. I’ll try that tomorrow 🙂
Cranky said she was just going to write one line a day. If she wants to do more she can. I decided I would do 10 mins. on the treadmill and so far so good. Maybe you can do 3 mins. instead of 6 and then go back and do another 3. As long as you get it done……
Yes Jo I suppose the important bit is that it gets done, right? I’d like to get it out of the way first thing in the morning if I can, because I figure if I’ve hurt in pursuit of the end goal I’ll be less inclined to taint the day by stupid eating. I hope I find my exercise groove, I don’t fancy fighting with my asshole voice every day from here to eternity!
I just got off my torture device, for a break and am about to get back on – you’ve got this – me too – you won’t quit even if you take a break. I took a break, and I’m back on my horse. We’ve BOTH got this and I will kick your royal arse if you quit for too long.
Remember when you first started walking? Remember how good it felt when you realized you had less pain? Then NO pain? Then you took that long walk on vacation? Then you made it farther than you ever had out of town?
Don’t focus on that excursion you’ve got planned – just focus on TODAY
I know you’re right…I think where to put your focus is the key. I’m still learning. And I’m a bit scared of getting my arse kicked now Hahahahaha 🙂
Also – does yours go backwards? The one here and at the gym go backwards – with equal resistance – and I find I can do it better if I switch back and forth
Yes it does…good thinking!
Oh good! That makes a huge difference to my endurance!
Hi I am new to the blog and my two pennies are that–You are amazing and very inspirational. You can defo do 10 minutes- believe it. Say it like a mantra. I also find headphones with music helps and tell myself just to do 5 songs and then distract myself by out of tune singing and getting words wrong!
Hey Geri, welcome to the posse! Thanks so much for your kind words, and what a great idea…singing out of tune is something I can do really well! I’m not sure I could sing whilst pedalling, I can barely breathe and pedal at the same time right now…but all in good time, right?! 🙂