So I had several friends yesterday who did battle with the post-Christmas sales so they could snap up some bargains. Me, I love the idea of it, and God knows I love a good deal but the reality of joining thousands of other bargain hunters in the annual bunfight is just something I can’t contemplate. I mean, if they’d be happy to open up the store an hour before everyone else and let me quietly swan around picking off all the good stuff, well I’d be all over that…sadly I wasn’t born to that life.
But I did want to grab a bargain of my own…I think I’ve mentioned before that I’ve been mooching on line for a few weeks hoping to spot an exercise bike. I have to get fit this year if I’m going to conquer those mountains in Cuba and I sort of know that’s not going to happen of it’s own accord so I’ve been keeping my eyes open you know, for a bargain. I’ve trawled eBay and other similar resale sites and nothing’s really come up so I thought I’d chance my arm in the on-line January sales.
Now I approached this particular bargain hunt with extreme caution. For those of you who have read my ‘Exercise In The Home’ blog post from way back in August, you’ll understand my propensity for getting totally carried away in the moment, and buying something that isn’t what I think it is, and which has a lifetime use of zilch. I’m thinking of the treadmill that wasn’t a treadmill and the power plate in particular, but over the years there have been many. They come, they go. They get assembled, admired, occasionally dusted but rarely used. Not this time…this time is different.
Let’s recap. I wanted a cheap exercise bike, to help me get fit. Is that what I bought..? No of course that’s not what I fucking bought, that would be way too easy, right? What I bought was a state of the art elliptical cross trainer. Yes, I’m shaking my head right along with you. FFS!
So let me try and explain, as much for my benefit as yours because as of right now I’ve woken up and put myself in the doghouse. As part of my cautious approach (stop laughing) I wanted to do my homework. So I had a look on line at what kind of equipment gives you a good all over workout, helps to build stamina, doesn’t put too much strain on your joints, all that good stuff.
To be honest, the exercise bike idea came pretty low down the table. Great for legs, and good cardio but not too hot on upper body, and the bingo wings wouldn’t even get a look in. So I started mooching more widely and the general consensus was that an elliptical cross-trainer would tick pretty much all boxes. Right then…I’ll get me one of them. A cheap one.
Apparently, the cheap ones are perfectly fine for servicing a skinny string bean who doesn’t weigh more than a helium balloon. If you have so much as one toe in sumo it’s a different story. Seemingly, to avoid it all going horribly wrong and ending up tangled in a machine that’s collapsed around you as you work up a sweat, you have to spend more. A fair bit more as it turns out. Ker-ching!
On reflection, I’m slowly inching my way out of the doghouse. It’s an investment in my commitment to this journey and to the longer term abolition of these bingo wings which have to be tucked into my sleeves on a daily basis. Yes, I could have bought an annual membership to a fancy gym for the same money, but I don’t think I could make that fit into my life. I’m time poor, and there’s no sense in setting myself up to fail.
It’s going to look ridiculous in my bedroom, a big shiny steel monster amongst the shabby chic of patchwork, stone and beams, but I can fall out of bed and get at it before I shower in the morning. Crap. I’m going to hate it aren’t I? But you know what, that’s ok…I’m mentally preparing myself. I’ve no doubt that I will wear my very best ‘bulldog chewing a wasp’ face as I get to grips with it and I’m pretty sure I’ll turn the air blue by effing and jeffing on a daily basis. At first. But I’m going to make damned sure this one doesn’t end up as a clothes stand. That’s my promise to myself, and you all heard me, right?
It gets delivered sometime next week…I’m excited with a touch of trepidation but 2016 starts here, and I’m ready 🙂
