I’ve always thought that perspective is a mystical thing. It captivates me how two people can look at one thing, whether that’s a picture, an object or even just a situation, and see two completely different things. And the view of the two people next to them would be different again. How can that even happen..? It’s like anything else to do with the human condition…an endless source of fascination. You may have come across this picture before…do you see the elegant young lady looking over the right hand shoulder of her fur coat, or do you see the wizened old lady with a pointy chin and sad eyes..?
I’m less clear what it says about us as individuals depending on which one we see first, but I do know that seeing both perspectives is easier when you’ve studied it awhile, or maybe if someone shows you a different way of looking at it. Some people can only ever see the one angle. And that’s pretty reflective of the way people see the world too. We’re all different.
My perspective varies depending on the way I’m feeling about two things; how much my eating is in or out of control, and how fat or skinny I am. I’m not talking about the picture now, I’m talking about the way I see things around me, and the way I interpret situations. I could look at the same challenge, and evaluate my ability to overcome it in two completely different ways depending on my perspective in that moment.
Let me give you an example. You all know I’m rooted firmly in this sweet spot where my diet is concerned, right? I’ve got a lot of skin in the game since my last bad food decision – I’ve been dieting for exactly four months and although I switched food plans, and I’ve done a little creative points allocation here and there to accommodate life, I’ve never stepped off the path. Not once.
And the fact that I haven’t, means I’m not likely to, you know? I feel strong, and as though I can go toe to toe with any food challenge which comes my way, and ace it. My four months’ worth of skinny choices is the anchor which is keeping me in the sweet spot. But let’s just imagine that this weekend I blew it, with the intention of getting back in the game on Monday.
Come Monday, I’d have no skin in the game since my last bad food decision…I’d be starting again with a clean sheet. No anchor. And without the anchor, my perspective on all of it is different. It’s much easier to think oh go on then…I’ll start again tomorrow…or Monday, yes that’s it I’ll start again on Monday.
So how cool would it be, if we could re-frame our perspective and use that to wrestle control back over what we do and how we feel? I was reading an article a few days ago about re-programming cellular memory as a way of reducing anxiety, and I wonder if we might be able to bend the concept a bit and see whether it would work as a tool in our collective kit-bag.
Go with me on this one ok?
Imagine it’s a Monday, and on the Sunday you’d fallen out of the naughty tree and hit every branch on the way down, I mean I’m talking big-time naughty…full english breakfast, big old sunday lunch followed by sticky toffee pudding, and then crumpets with lashings of butter for tea. So it’s Monday and you wake up feeling like crap knowing you blew it yesterday.
What if, you could lay there and walk your way through yesterday in your mind, but substitute the memory of those naughty meals with skinny choices. If you were able to imagine how those grapefruit segments in natural juice tasted so sweet and sharp on your tongue at breakfast time. How the lean fillet steak and light-roasted vegetables tasted at lunchtime, and how you weren’t really hungry at tea time so you had a nice skinny latte with a couple of crackers later in the day.
How effective do you think that would be, with a bit of practice, in terms of re-framing your perspective on how well the food plan is going, and how strong you are?
I’m curious, as to whether it might work. I mean, we’d need to exercise caution…if it works, the asshole in my mind would be all over it, encouraging me to throw caution to the wind today because tomorrow I can fool my head into thinking I’ve been good and we wipe the slate clean. But as a concept, for emergency slip-ups only it might be worth a shot, as a way of getting our head back in the game quickly.
What do you think..? Shall we have a go..? First one to slip on a banana skin over the holidays gives it a shot and reports back so the posse can pick over the bones and decide whether it’s in or out of the toolkit?
I have definitely stepped out of my usual eating habits for the past week, because of holiday parties. I dread my daily step onto the scales, but I do it anyway and see the results of my indiscretions. I think I might try this, but how do I explain to the asshole in MY mind that I’m just imagining that number on the scale? 🙂
I’m not sure you can! I think you might just have to completely stonewall him,sing very loud and don’t listen to him! Easier said than done but hey, worth a try, right?!
Well, i wonder if it can be tested in other situations to see if it works. For example, if someone has a bad temper and is trying to curb it, remember back to yesterdays angry blow up and reframe it, remembering being calm and cool and dealing with it rationally, would starting to do that help you do it in the future?
Fascinating idea!
Yes, I’m thinking I could apply it to exercise too! D x
Where does the phrase “skin in the game” come from? I’ve not heard it before.
Apparently research shows that beating yourself up over bad choices tends to have a poor outcome, you are better off being kind to yourself. I think rewriting your memories would be helpful, and avoid the shame spiral.
I’m not sure, I think it’s a gambling phrase but it’s something my old boss used to say and I kind of like how it fits…it means how invested you are into something ?
This time the skin in the game has made a difference. I mean, if you jump off for a weekend, you have not gained back every ounce that you lost in 4 months! What if you did? So if you are back where you started than at least you aren’t 10 lbs heavier. I mean there is only so much you can gain in 2 days. (Although God knows I have pushed that to the limits).
Ha, me too at times…but not this weekend happily ?
I like it 🙂
I like more thinking about things in the braoder term like you’ve been saying – it really helps me. Any time I may have a bad moment, it doesn’t matter all that much in the grand scheme as long as it remains a small moment. Stops the downward spiral.
But I like the idea of reframing and making better choices next time – I have been SO committed that while I’ve had bad meals, or moments, they’re usual not actually bad because I write it down and move on – I have yet to just throw in the towel for a day or so – we’ll see how things continue. But I look forward to hearing how others might make this work, and I will try to find opportunities to use it in my daily battle
Me too Cherie…I might try it with exercise too…my head is chewing at the theory!
Hi, Dee!
Rereading…. I often do read over (& go back again for the pithy morsels), & I LOVE it when others tell you they have done the same, & they provide still more ideas.
That said, this proposition – of course, not a siren song to step a toe off the train, i don’t even entertain that possibility…. We had more or less disposed of the old-speak, “Monday, then.” It was a linchpin of the frustrating repeating failure diet: your notion of consciously reprogramming the morning after, seizing back our momentum, could be a powerful tool.
Several of us have mentioned little slips & teeters. But no one is (I think) flinging themselves down the ravine. I’m adding my voice to yours: this is such a wonderful journey! We are still rolling. Don’t anyone cave in! Look at the decorative calligraphy on your wall & re-read the message, “I am pretty damn awesome.”
Fleury
I’m hoping I don’t need to test the theory Fleury, but I’m going to sit on the curiosity and wheel it out if ever I do…you know when your head is insisting something might work but you can’t test the theory…maybe I’ll find out one day!