Skin in the Game

feeling good

I’m enjoying something of an easy ride at the moment – truth be told I feel almost guilty that I’m not providing you with more drama, like my diet blog won’t properly earn it’s stripes unless it’s chock-a-block with tales of struggles and overcoming adversity. All I’ve managed to do so far is to demonstrate that the asshole is…well, an asshole who spends his days just being annoying rather than effective. Which must be twisting his melon BIG TIME because I’ve been such a pushover in the past.

This sweet spot that I’ve landed in is providing me with a protective shell against the worst of him – that, and the company of our posse, obviously. Don’t get me wrong, he hasn’t gone away…he had a bit of a chew at me yesterday in fact. To cut a long story short I had a really early start and I’d taken breakfast with me (low carb muffins, see my foodie page) – the first opportunity to eat didn’t present itself until I was settled on the short flight over to Ireland (which I made with 7 minutes to spare due to heavy traffic, talk about squeaky bum time!) and as I thought about reaching into my bag to get one out,  I was acutely aware of him chuntering on in my ear about how everyone on the flight would look at me with contempt and think ‘trust the fat girl to bring a picnic for a 30 minute flight hahahaha‘ – his words did sting a bit and I decided not to eat. So he still has the ability to make me second-guess myself, but no real teeth to throw me off track, for now.

I’m fascinated as to the reason why – what is it that’s making this feel like a walk in the park? I’ve become gradually more aware over the last couple of weeks in particular that I’m nurturing a deep down core belief that this will be one of the times in my life where I’ve really managed to get a hold of myself and I’m going to complete the long march from fat to skinny, that’s how secure I feel right now. I’m scared to turn over too many stones in my desire to understand what makes this time different, in case it vanishes like a fart in the breeze – sharing my thoughts with the posse on a daily basis is definitely helping, and I suspect that having almost six weeks’ worth of skin in the game is also a factor.

In the first flush of resolve with a new diet it’s easy for him to justify a slip-up as a false start, and persuade me to get on board with his twisted thinking but the fact that I’ve managed not to let his barrage of chatter un-nerve me is turning down the volume of his voice ever so slightly. I wouldn’t say he’s on the ropes but he’s definitely spending more time in his corner.

One piece of exciting news that I have to share is that Crabby McSlacker from Cranky Fitness invited me to submit a guest blog to her website – I cannot begin to tell you how much I’ve chuckled at the prospect of me writing an article for a fitness website. I mean you almost have to have an epi-pen on standby whenever I so much as think about exercise! I’ll post a link when it goes live, in case you’d like to check it out.

So all in all a great week – I’m just going to keep on keeping on…as always, I appreciate your company, it’s helping more than you know. I hope things are going equally well for you guys 🙂

 

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6 thoughts on “Skin in the Game

  1. I came here from Crabby, which I found just that day as well – and I’m so glad I did! I’ve read through from the beginning – I am only a few weeks behind you in ‘starting again’ and a year ahead of you in birthdays – and you know what? I wanted to do this when I was turning 50, and looking back, why didn’t I succeed? Why didn’t I do it? It doesn’t matter nearly as much as the fact that I don’t want to be saying the thing a year from now when I’m about to turn 52 – I’ll just stay on the train now thanks, and no matter how far I’ve come by then, it will be further than I am now!

    1. Well it’s great that you’re on the train now…we sound very similar and it’s a crying shame you’re not next door with your dog – but in any event we’re on the same journey and it’s lovely to have your company 🙂

  2. Well I, for one, am over here via Crabby’s! Best wishes to you, I’ll be back to read more soon…
    – The Former High School Jock Who Dreams of Regaining Lost Glory

  3. Sounds like you’re in a really great place, Dee — keep it up! 🙂

    My therapist says not to worry too much about the “whys”, but instead focus on the “hows” of moving forward. I think we can get bogged down too much when we try to figure out why things happen the way they do or why we do the things we do. It ends up distracting us from HOW to do them and continue being successful. This is a lesson I’m still learning (obviously!), but I’m getting better at it.

    Those omelet muffins look so yummy! Will have to give them a try! 🙂

    1. Hi Julie, they really are very tasty…even I can make them and I’m not exactly a domestic goddess! And yes I’m going to focus on the how…it sounds like a sensible approach 🙂 D x

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