Tag Archives: sugar detox

My Sugar Swan Song

In the here & now, ,

So I weighed in yesterday at the end of my first full week in this shiny new year and happily it was a number worthy of the effort I’d put in, so I’m feeling great that I’m off to a flying start. It’s also one whole year since I started recording my weekly weigh-in with a picture on my Shitbird page, which makes it easy to look back and see what I lost this exact week last year.

I’d started my clean eating challenge if you remember, and I managed to cut out sweet things altogether. At the time I think I described myself as refined sugar free, and although when I look back I wasn’t exactly sugar free, my version was good enough. No sweets, cake, ice-cream, chocolate or crisps. I gave a very wide berth to every single trigger food on my list, and I felt calm and in control. It really worked for me, so guess what…I’m going there again.

I’ve had a great couple of weeks. I’ve lost my Christmas weight, and I’m not getting mega-hassle from the Asshole voice, but he is there snapping at my heels. I know I’ve been playing with fire, and filling up on free food so I can snack on the sort of stuff that should really send me straight to hell. I’ve got away with it so far, but I refuse to spend the next twelve months in a scene from Groundhog Day, losing and gaining the same thirty pounds. I’m putting my foot down, I mean, I’m really not doing it. 

I don’t want to get bogged down in analysis paralysis, but I look back at those numbers from the first few months of last year and you know what, there’s no getting away from the story they tell is there? By the end of April I’d lost thirty pounds. Thirty pounds!!  Then comes the point where I obviously rekindled my love-affair with the fat-girl crack and for two months after that I lost fuck all, well except for the plot, clearly.

I briefly wrestled control back in July, before spending the next six months snaking my way right back up to just two pounds away from where I’d started.

I’ve done a lot of reflection over the weekend, and it’s no accident that the most successful bit of last year coincided with my decision to eat cleanly and cut out the crap. So, that’s my plan, only this time I’m going to keep it up for longer. I managed four whole months last year, including a sugar-free holiday aboard a ship where chefs waited around every corner just to tempt me, and still I lost weight. I enjoyed the challenge, so I know I can do it when I put my mind to it.

Right now feels like the right time. I might as well capitalise on the fact that I’m not being a dickhead. The stars are aligned and my head is playing nicely, so I’m all in. I enjoyed a lovely meal with friends yesterday where I had a small slice of naughty, and I ate a ginger nut last night…let’s call that my sugar swan song shall we, because from now on, I’m done.

I find that weirdly exciting 🙂

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Two Days And Counting

In the here & now, ,

So I’m two days into my sugar divorce and I’m doing okay. I’ve only had one slip up and that was sort of an accident. Well I’m saying an accident, actually it was more of a reflex action. Someone was passing a tub of chocolate-covered hob nob marshmallows from table to table in a training course I was helping to run yesterday. I didn’t notice it heading towards me, but when the tub came at me from the left, I shoved one in my mouth and passed it to my right.

My arm responded to that tub of hob-nob chocolate in the same way me knee would’ve responded to a reflex hammer…there was bugger-all thought involved whatsoever on my part.

Yes, I know. I sat with that hob-nob marshmallow on my tongue and thought Shit! I’m not supposed to be eating this…

I didn’t feel it was appropriate to spit the damned thing out again, I mean that would make me a weirdo, right? So I made the most of my accidental snack, and sucked it until I only had one little oat left in the middle of my tongue. Which I appreciate still makes me a tiny bit weird, I mean who sucks a marshmallow..? The important thing is, I didn’t compound the situation by eating a bunch more of them and it only cost me thirty three calories.

I’d love to claim full credit for resisting the temptation to go back for more, but actually there were none left once everyone had pitched in. What do you mean, did I look? You fucking know I did. But, even with the taste of chocolate on my tongue I didn’t go find something else instead when I realised the tub was empty and I could have, because there was a shop and cafe dead opposite where we were working.

I don’t think that one indiscretion means I have to re-set the dial. I’ve got fifty six hours and one cock-up under my belt but I don’t feel any worse for having eaten it, and I’ve definitely got less sugar running through my veins than I did two days ago. Seriously, I’m as grouchy as it’s possible to be without actually ripping someone’s face off. Maybe I should be duct-taped to the bed with someone standing guard as I go cold turkey but so far, with the exception of that one incident it’s largely been uneventful. I’m coping, even if my turkey is still only lukewarm.

I did sack off the idea of going swimming last night, so I’m not entirely behaving like a skinny girl. The length swim last night was 9pm-10pm and by that time I’d been in pyjamas for three hours and I seriously couldn’t be arsed. My boy raised an eyebrow and commented that before the holiday I would’ve gone without thinking and he’s right, so there’s definitely still work to do on shifting the holiday mindset.

The fact that he noticed – and commented – has closed off my option of bumming for two days in a row though, so I’ll definitely be in the pool tonight… 🙂

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